I wanted to see if I could write a preface for Galileo so superficially orthodox and at the same time so transparently insincere that he could safely publish his theory. This one might have worked, but I’m not sure I’d risk the fire on the strength of it.
PREFACE
Here is a theory that must be wrong: the earth moves around the sun
The reasons for this theory are all mathematical. They are presented in Section B.
The mathematics all work correctly, and so this theory looks correct.
But of course it cannot actually be correct, because the Holy Church says it contradicts the Holy Bible. The Bible says that the sun stood still at the Battle of Jericho (Judges 12:24). This suspension of the natural laws was a miracle of God.
Therefore the theory must be wrong, despite the flawless mathematics, because the Bible is superior to any mathematical proof and must be believed no matter what the numbers say. This too is a miracle of God – as before, natural law is superseded by Divine Law.
The presence of mathematical proof that the earth moves around the sun is a test of Christian faith. Of course, as a Christian, in case of conflict I believe the Bible rather than mathematics. I publish my proof only as a warning: Christians, don’t believe it, no matter how convincing it may appear! The Bible is always right, and any mathematical proof that appears to contradict it must be wrong, by definition.
Galileo Galilei
During the 2012 Republican primary contests for President, after saying correctly for months how dishonest Mitt Romney was, and how sneakily Romney was trying to defeat him by maligning his character (hard to do to Newt Gingrich, but still he tried), Gingrich finally withdrew and endorsed him. I write this endorsement announcement to reveal what Gingrich probably thought. See also my doggerel
Mitt and Newt.
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
May 2, 2012
Due to disappointing results in the primaries traceable in large part to Gov. Romney’s millions of dollars worth of false and unethical attack ads, I am suspending my campaign for President until the Convention in August. I urge all delegates to vote for me at the Convention.
I will endorse Romney to this extent: although he is a dishonest campaigner and an unprincipled man of no genuine convictions, if he is nominated at the Convention he would probably be a better President than Barack Obama. And so, if reduced to that awful choice between two unqualified candidates, I would vote for Romney over Obama and suggest that others should also.
– 30 –
Insincerity (2)
PREFACE
Here is a theory that must be wrong: the earth moves around the sun
The reasons for this theory are all mathematical. They are presented in Section B.
The mathematics all work correctly, and so this theory looks correct.
But of course it cannot actually be correct, because the Holy Church says it contradicts the Holy Bible. The Bible says that the sun stood still at the Battle of Jericho (Judges 12:24). This suspension of the natural laws was a miracle of God.
Therefore the theory must be wrong, despite the flawless mathematics, because the Bible is superior to any mathematical proof and must be believed no matter what the numbers say. This too is a miracle of God – as before, natural law is superseded by Divine Law.
The presence of mathematical proof that the earth moves around the sun is a test of Christian faith. Of course, as a Christian, in case of conflict I believe the Bible rather than mathematics. I publish my proof only as a warning: Christians, don’t believe it, no matter how convincing it may appear! The Bible is always right, and any mathematical proof that appears to contradict it must be wrong, by definition.
Galileo Galilei
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
May 2, 2012
Due to disappointing results in the primaries traceable in large part to Gov. Romney’s millions of dollars worth of false and unethical attack ads, I am suspending my campaign for President until the Convention in August. I urge all delegates to vote for me at the Convention.
I will endorse Romney to this extent: although he is a dishonest campaigner and an unprincipled man of no genuine convictions, if he is nominated at the Convention he would probably be a better President than Barack Obama. And so, if reduced to that awful choice between two unqualified candidates, I would vote for Romney over Obama and suggest that others should also.
– 30 –